Robert Lattibeaudiere
Mindset & Life Coach

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Robert Lattibeaudiere
Mindset & Life Coach

Personal – Professional – Sport – Performance coaching

Monthly Archives: May 2016

Dealing with negative comments

At some point we all come across negativity in some form or another, and it can crush your confidence. But how do you deal with it? You could be thinking of setting up in business or taking your current one to a much higher level. It could be you want to apply for your first management role. Maybe you’re a sports person or in a team or just starting out on the road to try and get fit and lose weight. Maybe you’re a budding body builder and have plans to go on stage for the first time and compete. Perhaps you’re about to embark on a major change in life, such as going to University as a mature student or going travelling.

It could be anything that you’re trying to achieve. I used those particular scenarios as I’ve recently been asked, by people in those positions, how to deal with receiving sometimes hurtful negative comments, or others trying to put you down with humour by mocking your efforts publicly. What I get asked about most is negativity online (or trolls as they’re some times know). Those people who like to sit behind the comfort of their keyboard and typing nasty negative comments about people.

My answer is always the same. Anyone who goes out of their way to attack or drag you down for trying to achieve something or better yourself, is usually lacking in their own self belief and hugely insecure! They have to mock or pull others down as, deep inside themselves, they don’t believe they could achieve what you’re trying to do. Not only that, they don’t believe they can achieve their own goals or dreams and probably gave up on them long ago. They then have to feed their psychological need to feel good, and have significance, by laughing at or attacking someone else’s dreams.

My advice is to keep your focus on you. This is their issue to deal with. You could be going out and feeding the homeless in your spare time and someone will have something negative to say (I’ve seen this!). Whatever you do, some will love it and some won’t. Don’t let anyone steal you energy. Tony Robbins says, “energy flows where focus goes”, concentrate your energy on what you’re trying to achieve. The late, great Jim Rhon said ” you are the average of the 5 people you spend most time with”. Surround yourself with people who inspire, love and support you and keep going. Try to find at least one other person to share the journey with you. If you’re the only person you know on your path, use the wonders of the internet to research subjects you’re into, join a club or a group and hang out with people who are as passionate as you. You’ll be surprised how many people out there are also interested in what you’re doing. The ‘dream stealers’ of this world will soon move on to find another fix to satisfy their insecurities.

Five steps to successful onboarding


Many employers still make the mistake of putting new hires straight into their roles, expecting them to settle in on their own as if they’ve worked there for months!  It’s surprising how little thought goes into onboarding, especially at large companies where they have the resources to do the job properly.

I’ve worked for organisations where onboarding consisted of having new starters shadow someone for a day or two, (if they weren’t too busy), and that was that! Poor onboarding can be costly, with new hires taking longer than necessary to reach full productivity or leading to people leaving very quickly, especially if they’re good.  Considering the cost, time and effort of finding the right person in the first place, a thorough plan for getting a new starter up to speed should be high on the agenda.

In case you were thinking it, onboarding isn’t just for large organisations. Having worked in both large and small companies, I’ve had the opportunity to see its effectiveness in both.  Even in smaller businesses, it’s a fantastic opportunity to not only settle the new member of the team in, but to have them become productive and happy employees far quicker.  We’re not talking about a quick orientation here; walk them around the building, introduce them to a few people along the way and give them a copy of the company handbook, then leave them to fend for themselves. Onboarding goes beyond this, as the first few weeks are crucial to embedding the business’ culture into the new starter.

Here are my steps to onboarding a new team member and seriously increasing their odds of success in the business;

  1. 1. Even before they start, send a letter or email, or call them to confirm the details of any parking, the dress codes, their start date and time and, if possible, the name of an onboarding partner/buddy who can help them with any issues in their first few weeks.
  2. 2. Allocate them an onboarding buddy who shows them around the building, introducing them to people as they go, and shows them where all the amenities are.  They’re also on hand to answer any questions they may have and check that they’re doing okay. This is crucial, as there’s nothing worse than a brand new member of the team sitting at their desk, looking around wondering what to do and who to speak to.
  3. 3. Set up a ‘new starter meet & greet team’.  This can be just one or two people, or more depending on the size of your organisation, who are great examples of what the company stands for, who live your company values and really embody the culture you want to promote.  They meet every new employee and give a personal account of their time in the business as well as a description of what it’s like to work there and what’s expected.  They can also be called upon for help if the new hire’s onboarding buddy isn’t available and they need advice.  This is a fantastic way to embed people into your company’s culture.  It’s also great for the confidence of the employee who can hit the ground running much faster, knowing there’s help on hand.
  4. 4. It’s a great idea to have already filled the employee’s calendar for the first week or two. Book in meetings with any members of staff they’ll be working regularly with in other departments and have them meet the senior team and directors, even briefly, as this lets them know everyone in the business values them as a member of the team and has a genuine interest in them being successful. Remember the first few days of a new hire’s experience with your company is going to lay the foundations of their impression of your business.  If your attitude towards your onboarding is one of disinterest or is something cobbled quickly together, it will be evident to the employee.
  5. 5. Establish a well thought out training plan that takes into account different learning styles (see Honey and Mumford), and gives the new hire time to practice and absorb what they’ve learnt (see Kolb’s learning cycle).

If you do this, every new person will see that you genuinely care about their experience, and you’ll significantly raise your chances of having highly productive and happy team members, who embody your culture.

5 very simple steps to add rocket fuel to your morning, and life!


The way you spend the first 30-60 mins of your morning can have a massive impact on the rest of your day and even your life. A more productive morning routine will mean you are more productive in life as well. Changing my morning routine a couple of years ago, made a huge impact on my life and it can on yours by giving yourself a little time to follow some very simple steps.

It’s fair to say we all have rituals in our life, whether we like it or not. The way we handle our finances, relationships, our health or even our children.  If you look at someone who goes weight training five times a week, you can usually work out, just by looking at them, their attitude and rituals towards working out.  The things we do on a daily basis have a huge impact on the results we get from life.

Starting the day in a proactive and not reactive state is powerful.  Waking up, after hitting the snooze button three times, checking social media and emails for half an hour then rolling out of bed to have an unhealthy breakfast and a quick wash followed by a dash to get to work on time, isn’t an inspiring way to start the day!  Reacting to social media, emails or what’s on the news is stressful and unhelpful.

Many of the most successful people in the world such as Oprah Winfrey, Tony Robbins, Mark Zuckerberg, Barack Obama, the list goes on and on, take control of their day with good rituals.  As you known these people weren’t just lucky, they have certain things they do daily that make them successful and it starts with daily rituals that turbo charges their morning and allow them to be focused and have the energy to attack the day.  They do things to help them have a strong body and mind.

Here are my 5 simple steps that are guaranteed to add rocket fuel to your morning, make you productive all day and change the quality of your life. If you want to be as successful as you can in life and help others as well, you can’t do that until you help yourself first.

  1. 1. Get up when your alarm goes off.  The snooze button is not your friend! Dropping back in and out of sleep makes you groggy and by hitting snooze you’re subconsciously telling yourself you’ve failed in your first commitment of the day.  Waking up at the time you set the night before is the first step in conditioning yourself to achieving your goals. It may be a small win but, lots of small wins throughout the day equals a fantastic 24 hours.  Tomorrow, when your alarm goes, jump up and grab a glass of water or green tea straight away.
  2. 2. Mental Vitamins!  Take two or three a day with your tea. What I mean by this is, have written down two or three positive affirmations and say them out loud. One of your affirmations could be “I have all that I need to achieve what I want today”. Then, while you drink your morning tea or water, take time to say what you’re grateful for, it could be as simple as having a warm bed to sleep in, a job to go to or just that you’ve woken up! Expressing gratitude helps you put your life in perspective and gives you a more positive outlook. Whilst doing these genuinely try and smile as this creates a ‘feel good’ state that you will take on through the day.
  3. 3. Pick two big wins for the day.  Before you go to bed, pick two things that, if you accomplished them will feel like the day was a success.  In the morning, look at what you’ve picked, close your eyes for a minute and visualise yourself doing those things.  Try to be as specific as possible, play the images out in your mind and see yourself doing them successfully. You can’t have huge, epic wins every day, but having a strategy like this will keep you focused and moving in the right direction.
  4. 4. Exercise! Yep, you probably guessed that this would been in the list somewhere; and maybe, like a lot of people, you are filled with dread at the thought of anything more punishing, first thing in the morning, than walking downstairs or lifting a kettle!  Relax, you don’t have to run a 10k to get some benefit here. Between 5-7 mins of activity is enough to get you breathing heavily and it won’t have a major impact on your time.  Exercising takes care of your mind as well as your body.  Your body is linked to emotion, and even some light exercise can go a long way to combating stress and makes you feel good for up to 7 hours after.
  5. 5. Breakfast.  Now I know some people will say they never eat breakfast or can’t face anything until after 11am.  One of the best things you can do for yourself, your mind and your body, is to eat a healthy breakfast especially after exercise.  It doesn’t have to be much, it could be a nice green smoothie or some fruit.  My personal choice is porridge with banana, nuts and dried fruit with a cup of green or peppermint tea.  This sets me up for the day and keeps me going until my next meal.

Take charge of your morning! When you start to be proactive and look after yourself first, you become much stronger at dealing with whatever the day throws at you.  As I mentioned before, morning rituals massively helped change my life and we all have them. Ask yourself, do yours get you pumped for the day or disempower you? Are they slowing you down, holding you back or helping you get what you want from life?